I have my friend Blondie, who is this really awesome girl that I sit with on the bus. She was one of the first people I met when I moved, and she's really the closest friend I have right now. I don't know- we just clicked.
She's going through a lot of stuff. For example, her dad is in the Army, and he just went last fall to someplace in the Middle East, I think. Clearly, she's super worried about him and misses him a lot. There's also that she might be moving, which, while it isn't really a huge deal for me, it can still be nerve-wracking, especially if you don't know where or when. I mean, her whole future could change on this, especially now that we're a little close to graduation. It's just in a little over two years! Of course, she's also in a dance class that I think is daily right after school (and our bus schedule changed, so she has even less time at home to get ready for dance. Like, 10 minutes), and she used to be in color guard, and is in a school choir, and takes one or two AP classes... She has a lot of stuff going on.
Ever since she found out her dad would have to go soon, I've seen her look pretty sad every once in a while, but this week I think she was at her worst. It killed me to see her like that when I saw her after school. She looked really sad and worn out, and maybe a little depressed... I got worried she would eventually just drop down and/or burst out crying.
I mean, what's a friend to do? I tried to give her a small bit of advice, hug her, say something funny to lighten her up, and listen. There isn't really anything I can do besides that, but I still wish I could do more.
I suddenly realized something, on one of those days I hugged her the moment I saw her. The look on her face... It reminded me of my sister.
I have said stuff about my sister, but not a ton, because, really, I don't want to. In a much similar fashion, stuff piled on her, and it's difficult for all of us. It's not something I want to talk about. I want to focus on the small things in life, not the big stuff that is not very pretty. One of the biggest things is that she recently found out she had depression- the kind that's not from some traumatic experience, but a chemical imbalance. When things that's aren't good happen...
I've always been inclined to immediately hugging my sister whenever she was sad, but I've done so a lot more often throughout the stay in the South. It also gives me this horrible feeling of uselessness when I know I can only hug her. I can't help take the pain away from her.
Seriously, why couldn't I have been the one to get all the stuff she got? I would've been able to handle it better- at least the physical pain, maybe. I don't know, maybe I wouldn't! But I would let the things that plague her inflict me instead if I could anyway! I don't like to see her hurt. She didn't deserve any of it.
This must be why Jesus was willing to die for us... Because he felt this way...
When I think like this, I realize I sound a lot like the Elrics. *laughs mirthlessly*
Of course I wouldn't want anyone to be sad, but especially no one I'm close to. So that must be why I suddenly want to hug Blondie more than ever... I really started treating her like she was my sister on the bus later, and she gave me this weird look. I didn't really think about what I was doing.
One of those bus rides, after she had rested her head on her backpack for a while (and failing to feel any better- it's the bus we're talking about, how could she?), she checked her phone, and saw she got a text from someone. It was some lady (who I think was her dance teacher or something?) that sent a group message that said something about rooting for sophomores tonight, then (paraphrasing here), "Let me know if you need me to pray for you, for whatever reason."
It's interesting here, because most people are Christians, and are not afraid to show it. They're more likely to pray before a school activity, or have a club (there's one called the Christian Athlete Fellowship or something, which I personally think is a bit idiotic, but I think most clubs are idiotic, so don't mind me) or just wear some cheesy T-shirt (they love T-shirts around here) with a Bible quite on the back. She is an active member of her church, and often goes to youth activities there too. We've discussed the differences between our churches, and the results were interesting to me. Even though we're both very loyal to our churches, I think, I've still been considering more and more bringing her to my branch sometime.
Anyway, so some random lady sending that to girls was not weird in the slightest.
My friend quickly texted back, "Please pray for me, because I've been really stressed out, and I need some peace."
She'd been telling me jut a few minutes prior that she wanted some peace in her life (that's the way she talks- it's a little weird to me, but I understand what she's saying). It was surprising, though, for me to actually see her take up that lady's offer.
I'd never been asked by someone if I could pray for them, or asked someone to pray for me. Yet, my friend was so stressed, and she so believed in the power of prayer, that this event occurred.
I don't know if she knew I saw that, but I did.
I realized maybe there was more I could do for her, even if it wasn't much.
I didn't want to just say to her, "I'll pray for you too!" since that could sound like bragging or something, but I still made the promise to myself that, at least for the next few days, I would pray for her. (I kinda wonder why she didn't directly ask me- maybe she hadn't thought of asking me, or thought it too weird? Maybe thought we didn't know each other long enough?) So far, I think the only time I didn't include her in a prayer was once when I really rushed.
I have full faith that I'm being heard, but I'm still really worried about her. I hope by tomorrow she'll be less tired, and/or I'll be prompted as to something I can do for her.
Today, during class, my YW president actually mentioned this really cool experience she had that had to do with the premortal life, and they talked about how sometimes it feels like you recognize someone, and you become best friends immediately- that perhaps it's because you were friends with them all the way back then, so you really do know them already... I started thinking maybe I also feel so close to her (I mean, I don't think she even knows that much about me) because of that too. Maybe a long time ago, before we were born, we were friends in the premortal existence- spirit buddies! I like that thought.
Oh yeah- the reason this has to do with faith. Seeing Blondie trust in prayer like that made me think about how much prayer can really bless others. I'm hoping she will be very blessed, whether a lot of it has to do with me or not.
No comments:
Post a Comment